Passion will eat you alive

“Why you keep doing that?”

It’s something he can’t answer because he genuinely doesn’t have any explanation other than the fact that he still does it, and that nothing else gives him the same feeling. Instead of answering, he turned the question back.

“Why do you ask?”

“Because you look like you’re in pain.”

That’s what other people see.

“You should stop doing what’s hurting you.”

He always thought he suffered more in his head than he ever did in reality. Turns out, it’s the opposite or rather, it’s equal. He’s undeniably in pain both in his mind and in reality, yet he keeps doing it anyway.

But what price would he have to pay to no longer be in pain? What would it even take to suffer less? And if he stopped, if he felt nothing doing it, would that be worth it? He thought it was pointless to keep going without feeling anything. But he also thought it was pointless to stop.

“Is there anything that hurts less?”

She went quiet. Which meant he won the argument , at least in his head. Say something. You’re the one who brought it up. Be responsible for your words.

Even people like Suzanne Collins, Hayao Miyazaki, or even Alysa Liu, people who built their lives around what they love have spoken about the pain and burn out that comes. And yet they kept going.

“I mean… why do people keep doing something they don’t even enjoy anymore?”

As she ask more question, the wind came again, and the trees moved and a few leaves let go without hesitation.

“I don’t know. Maybe it already eat me alive,”

Some people are like that. They find something steady and comfortable, and from there, they watch and wonder why someone would choose to stay in something that didn’t fit their standard.

Just watch. It’s okay. He thought.